The Joyful Widower

Ruminations on grief, joy, love, and the cross

Melinda

  • Same song, second verse…

    I’ve been absent from writing for quite a while now. It’s been difficult to do a lot of things that aren’t strictly necessary. I’ve kept my kids and myself fed, dressed, and housed, and I’ve gotten us to appointments and obligations, mostly on time. I’ve gotten myself to work. Apart from that, not much else.… Continue reading

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  • “You were lucky…”

    The worst thing anyone ever said to me as a new widower: “you were lucky.” A couple days after Melinda’s death, I called Social Security to notify them and to apply for whatever survivor benefits I was entitled to. The surviving spouse gets a one-time $255 death benefit (possibly more, depending on earnings, age, disability… Continue reading

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  • Tilsons… Meet the Tilsons…

    Last night, as I was chewing over what to write about today, I realized that I have some friends who knew both Melinda and Tracy, some friends who knew Tracy but not Melinda, some who knew Melinda but not Tracy, and (if this blog takes off), a growing audience of people who’ve never met any… Continue reading

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  • Marriage, Being Widowed, and the Cross

    “I didn’t sign up for this.” You may not have read the fine print, but yes, yes, you did. Years ago, when Melinda and I were doing pre-marital counseling with Fr. Stephen Freeman, he pointed out to us the hard truth that most people don’t (or don’t want to) think about when they are planning… Continue reading

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