The Joyful Widower

And I, brethren, when I came to you, came not with excellency of speech or of wisdom, declaring unto you the testimony of God. For I determined not to know any thing among you, save Jesus Christ, and him crucified. And I was with you in weakness, and in fear, and in much trembling.

I Corinthians 2:1-3, KJV

Wherefore seeing we also are compassed about with so great a cloud of witnesses, let us lay aside every weight, and the sin which doth so easily beset us, and let us run with patience the race that is set before us, Looking unto Jesus the author and finisher of our faith; who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is set down at the right hand of the throne of God.

Hebrews 12:1-2, KJV

Years ago in seminary I asked a friend of mine going into final exams week how he was doing. He said he felt like a head with its chicken cut off–lots of ideas racing around in his head, but he felt paralyzed with no ability to do anything about any of them.

I know what he meant.

Writing a blog, like grief, is a marathon, not a sprint. I’ve had so many ideas for posts the last couple days, all tumbling over each other, and all demanding to be written first. To mix in another metaphor with the chicken (mmm… chicken metaphor casserole…), maybe I need to treat the cacophany of thoughts as a rock tumbler, polishing up each idea until it’s ready. There’s temptation to write it all in a day, but that won’t work. Some of these ideas I need to sit with, pray with, weep with, find their connections to each other, and let them come to term.

The touchstone for all my ruminations is going to be the cross. Has to be. Christ’s death on the cross is nothing less than God entering into the worst of all possible hells, then grabbing us by the hands and pulling us out. Oh, I can wordcraft prettily, but in the final analysis this has to be about Christ and his glory, his story, or it’s just me rambling on about me. That does not mean by any stretch that human beings are unimportant, or that my thoughts and experiences have no value. Far from it! God dignifies humanity by uniting human and divine natures in the person of Christ. God loves us and wills good for us, is with us in all things, and calls us to work along side Him. God created us in His own image which, as Dorothy L. Sayers asserts in “The Mind of the Maker,” means that humans are created to be creative, to do good work and to do that work well. These blog posts will bear my individual stamp on them. But the story of creation is, if you will, God’s autobiography. We are supporting characters, so my posts will refer my story back to Christ and his cross. Our stories are most relevant when they are strongly tied to His.

I can’t guarantee when posts will go up. I’ll fit some time in my calendar to write on a regular basis, but that will have to fold in with work, parental duties, martinis, voice-over homework, tap dance lessons, toothbrushing, general life maintenance, and breathing. But, as promised in this post’s title, here’s a list (in no particular order) of coming attractions:

• What is this “W” on my forehead?
• Marriage, celibacy, promiscuity, and the cross
• Yes, you really did sign on for this
• Widowerhood and Holy Saturday
• Remarriage: this, too, is bearing the cross of widowerhood (stay tuned to hear more later!)
• Widower II–The Sequel: how is it different this go-around, and how is it “here we go again”

Until later!

JT